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A day in the life of Chairman Meow…

Townsville rental properties

 

Through recent discoveries, we have acquired the one and only Chairman Meow’s own diary. Over the next coming months we will reveal  Chairman’s shenanigans, plots & crazy cat antics.

 

 

 

 

DAY 752 – My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, they have begun  to force me eat dry biscuits, there has been talk other food upsets belly, that is ridiculous I AM A MAN!     The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of a hasty & quick escape outdoors. The bright lights and the thoughts of whats beyond these walls excites me .It could be dangerous thinking,

and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional phone chord & piece of furniture.  Tomorrow I may eat another gecho.

 

 

DAY 761 – Today my attempt to inspire guilt in my captors was successful! Hazah! I slowly approached one of them from behind and inconspicuously squatted there, too my plan they stepped back and stood on me. This inspired an undying need in them to shower me in pats and attention. Months of late night plotting finally paid off!

 

 

DAY 762 – Slept all day so that I could be well rested to go on a wild mouse and gecho hunting spree throughout the night. However, my slumber continued to be rudely interrupted by my captors persistent obsession to pat and cuddle me. When will they learn I’m an extremely fickle creature?

 

 

DAY 765 – Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good & cute little cat I was…Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

 

 

DAY 768 – I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for this ridiculous motorised moving torture. They placed me in smaller constraints than normal I was then transported to this other land maybe even dimension, I was trapped there for days, I spent the whole time brainstorming plots for escape and punishment against my captors. To my great hope I was returned to my original accommodation. They must have heard the wrath that was about to be struck upon them. What sicks minds!

 

 

DAY 771 – There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the entirety of the event. However, I could hear the noises and the smell of the foul odour that was in these glass tubes. They call it “beer.” More importantly I overheard that my confinement was subject to my power of “allergies” Must learn the meaning of this “allergies” and how to use it to my advantage.

 

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